insert suicide boys song here...
Today's been hell. Full of nothing but literally nothing. I've been sad. I miss you so much. This popped up on my memories today, && honestly I've been dreading it since February 1st. Because for some stupid reason, that was one of the things I thought about as I was staring at you on that table. That days been playing over && over in my head. Walking into that room in the hospital. Rachel holding my hand, you were covered, && for some stupid reason, I kept thinking, no, it's not her. It doesn't even look like her under that sheet. But there you were. Hair in a messy bun, I could see where you had been crying. I remember holding mother's face as she kept kissing you && repeating your name. I had to hold her face && tell her to breathe. I walked over to padre as he sat in that chair asking why over && over. I kissed you, I hugged you, I played with your hair. They had you covered in ice to pre...